Epilouge: Forgiveness
by SmileCauseItsWorthIt
Summary: Even ten years later past demons can haunt you. Sometimes all it takes to banish them is forgiving yourself. One-shot.


**Epilogue****:**** Forgiving**

The tall, lean, and fair-haired young man walked along the bustling street towards his appointment. He was a well-dressed and clean-shaven young man, about the age of twenty, perhaps a student at the local university. No one paid him much heed as he walked by the storefronts, he had a place to be and he wasn't going to be late. Just like everyone else, he hurried along in the cold, only pausing a moment to look at the horizon. It was supposed to snow soon, but unlike everyone else on the street, this young man liked the cold. Heat and humidity reminded him of a place far away; a place he despised recalling, but could never forget. As the man adjusted his gray wool coat, something caught his eye. It was a newspaper that grabbed his attention; more specifically the picture on the front page. It depicted a black-and-white photograph of a serial murderer and rapist. This young man would recognize the one in the picture anywhere. The fair-haired man slowly made his way over to the newspaper stand.

"Ralph? What are you doing? I thought you said you had somewhere to be?" a well-built, brown-haired man said. This man had invited his roommate, Ralph, out to see a movie with some lady-friends of theirs, but he had declined saying that he had an appointment he couldn't miss.

"Jeremy!" Ralph said, startled out of his daze. His roommate was the last person he had expected, or wanted, to see that day. "I-I… I do have somewhere to be. I was on my way. See you later."

Ralph had spoken so coolly and unattached-after stuttering of course- that Jeremy was left standing watching his friend walk away. For the past couple of days Ralph had been acting like this and it was worrying to Jeremy. Ralph hadn't eaten or slept in at least two days; whenever he began to doze, he was plagued by nightmares. Ever since Jeremy met him, Ralph had an "appointment" every Saturday afternoon; and ever since Jeremy had met him, Ralph always acted strange at that time of year. Something definitely haunted his friend's past, and he had a feeling he would never find out what.

Ralph walked down the street and approached the next news stand he saw. After buying a paper he hurried off to the building he liked to call his second home. It was there that Dr. Willson worked and helped him. His parents had first brought him to the psychiatrist after his return from the island. He had resented the wise old man at first, thinking that the whole idea was idiotic. Ralph thought he didn't need any help and that he was too old to talk about his feelings, but he was wrong. Without Dr. Willson, he would've broken. Just like the man whose picture was on the cover of that newspaper. He would know that face anywhere, it was Jack Merridew.

The door to Dr. Willson's office was thrown open and banged loudly against the wall. It slowly went back to the frame and closed with a quiet _click_; however, his client wasn't nearly as silent. This was the season doctor's most devout patient. This young man had been coming to him for nearly ten years to get over an experience that had happened when he was twelve-years-old.

"Ralph, what's the problem?" Even though he was being paid to help the boy, the doctor was genuinely concerned. He had grown to view the boy like a son. Ralph threw the newspaper onto his oak desk and plopped into the seat across from the kind doctor.

"_That_ is the problem. After all these years… Ten years… and now this! When I first saw the news reports I should have known it was him, I should have known! I should have known…" Ralph trailed off. He was at a loss for words and couldn't begin to describe how he was feeling. The Dr. Willson skimmed the article and knew what the boy meant. It was all about the recent capture of the serial rapist and murderer, Jack Merridew. The doctor knew all about him from Ralph's accounts of what happened on the island.

"Ralph, you couldn't have known that-"

"I should've! The all the blood at the scenes from the cut throats… It's just like him! I thought after we left the island he had changed, but he didn't! He still needed the violence and blood baths. I told you how he and the others tried to kill me and what they did to those pigs! It was awful, but none of us saw it then. When we left, I thought we all understood the wrongness of it all," Ralph finished in a near whisper and was practically in tears. Even though he had been back in England for ten years, Ralph was still dealing with his internal demons.

"Ralph, you couldn't have known. You were able to work everything out, he wasn't. This just proves that you're strong and brave enough to face what happens. You won't ever forget what happened on that island, but you can learn to live with it. That's what you're trying to do now. You go to law school, you have friends, and pretty soon you're going to find a girl and get married. I know it seems impossible now, but it will all work out in the end," Dr. Willson said gently. Ralph had tears streaming down his face, but sat quietly while the doctor spoke.

"Why should I get this life while other boys don't get too? Why did little Percival Madison kill himself? Why did Harry run away and go somewhere he was never found? Why did Jack do those things and go to prison? How come Piggy and Simon never got to come home?" Ralph's questions were broken by sobs, making it hard to understand him, but the wise psychiatrist knew what was going on. The younger man was grieving and blaming himself.

"It's time to forgive."

"What?"

"You have been forgiven for what happened by everyone but yourself. It's time to forgive yourself, Ralph."

The fair-haired young man now looked like the little boy that came into the doctor's office so long ago. He had tears running down his cheeks, but he was vigorously nodding his head to the doctor's words. He wanted to forgive himself, but that was easier said than done.

"Okay… Okay," Ralph said through sobs. Dr. Willson stood up from behind his desk and made his way over to the crying boy. He pulled him into an embrace then because sometimes, a little affection could fix it all.

**_A/N: School assignment that turned out pretty well. Hope you enjoyed!_**


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